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Power Point:
Twenty years. It seems like a long time doesn't it? And yet, it also seems like a short time. This last week, on the 29th of January, I remembered the twentieth anniversary of my husband's death. Surprisingly, it was a day full of remembering him with joy and love, and then it turned into a celebration of God's very great goodness and faithfulness to me in all that time. We would have been married fifty years in April. I have never remarried or even thought about it. I guess you could say that the Lord became my husband. He's done a very good job!
When I needed a hug, He made sure I got one. Either from someone He sent to me, or by hugging my heart with His comfort and promises. I had always hated the word "widow". To me, it meant someone lonely and poor and cast aside. In all actuality, it can mean exactly that. We definitely live in a couple's world. Advertisements are geared to that. Movies are usually about the great love affair between two people. I had to learn to grow past that and past broken dreams and pain to discover who I really am underneath it all.
I was a wife and a mother and suddenly my biggest job was no longer there.
Our "together" dreams for the future seemed buried, and the "team" that I was on, had dwindled to one. I knew that I had to hear God differently, and see Him differently. He had some big shoes to fill.
Shortly after my husband died, I had decided to go to church. It was a cold, rainy, February morning. It was my first time back and my daughter and I had recently begun attending a new church, so I knew no one there. The church was always crowded and the parking lot was a mess. The attendants usually directed you to the "upper" lot where you had to stand until a shuttle came to pick you up. I observed the parking lot attendant pointing everyone to the shuttle lot. Discouraged and sad, I said, "Lord, You promised to be my husband. My husband would have dropped me off at the front door." As my eyes lifted, I realized that the parking attendant was right in front of me, with a smile on his face, and kindness in his eyes, and he directed me to the lot where the church entrance was. I was stunned. I was even more stunned when I
I can promise you that God is a wonderful provider, a wonderful counselor, a patient and loving husband. As I learned to rely on that truth, my life definitely changed for the better. One morning as I was praying, he took me farther into Isaiah 54. It said, "For the mountains depart and the hills may be removed, But My Kindness will not depart from You, Nor shall my covenant of peace be broken. I will have mercy on you."
It's easy to sing God's praises when the mountains stand strong and steady. It's a sacrifice at times when they're moving; when you can't find sturdy ground to stand on. Learning to know Him as He really wants to be for you, to understand that where you are is where He has a miracle waiting for you. That is the gift that you receive when you choose to trust Him anyway, even though...
Twenty years. Twenty years of kindness without exception. Twenty years of growing in knowing how magnificent my heavenly Husband really is.
Some of us pray and think like widows. We pray from a point of lack, of need, or problem after problem. We seem to forget that we have a heavenly Husband. Isn't it time to stop that? Isn't it time to pray like the Bride of Christ, whose husband is the God of the whole earth, the Lord of Hosts?
Well, isn't it?
Power Thought:
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